Elf Central: HETALIA EDITION!
by Misognome
Summary: HI! This is my first story, so, if your gonna hate on me, remember this: HATERS GONNA HATE! Anyways, here at Elf Central, we force-i mean-have the people (or countries) do the embarrassing dares, answer the strange questions, and then do more embarrassing stuff! Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAMER: **I DON'T DUN DIDDLY OWN HETALIA OR THE CHARACTERS IN HETALIA. THOSE BELONG TO HIDEKAZU HIMARUYA. (I wish I did though…)

* * *

><p>*We open the show with 5 people sitting on a large couch and me and another person on a different couch, the older person (who has ocean blue hair, a blue tint to her skin, gills, webbed hands and feet, coral pink eyes) looks as though she doesn't want to be there and I'm (the girl with lightly tanned skin, Caribbean blue eyes, long wavy caramel brown hair, and long elf ears)bouncing around in my seat like a bunny on a sugar high*<p>

Atlantis (or Ati, she's the grumpy one on the couch): MISO-CHAN! THE CAMERAS ARE ON! SIT YOUR WOOD DRELVEN BUTT ON THE COUCH!

Misognome (me, the 'sugar-high bunny' or wood drelf [druid-wood elf mix]): *stops jumping up and down* Not my fault that Nova gave me marshmallows before we started the show. You should have stopped me and you didn't, so *sticks out tongue*

Atlantis: *rolls eyes* you're such a child… let's just get on with the show…

Misognome: Okay (jeez, you're grumpy)! Welcome to Elf Central! The show where we ask you random questions, make you do stupid dares, and-

England: This sounds like a rip off…

Misognome: SHOOSH THE FRUK UP, CHILD!*hits him on the head with a staff* LEMME FINISH! AS I Was saying, we make you answer embarrassing questions, do stupid dares and an author's choice where I make you do even more embarrassing shit! Our victim- I mean- Contestants are: England, America, Japan, Germany, and China!

England: *clutching head* FUCK! WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT BLOODY THING FROM?!

Misognome: *throws glitter in the air* Magic~

Atlantis: That's SO cheesy

Misognome: *hits her over the head with staff of DOOM* NO ITS NOT.

Atlantis: OKAY! FINE! JEEZ! IT'S NOT CHEESY!

*spotlight shines down on said victim- why do I keep saying that- contestants*

Misognome: So, What round do you want to do first?

America: NONE!

Misognome: *hits him upside the head with my staff*

America: *passes out*

China: *curls up in a little ball* O.O scary…

Germany and Japan: O.O

England: O.O h-how hard did you hit him?

Misognome: Hard enough to knock that fucker out.

China: *gets out of 'armadillo mode'* I-I would say questions, aru. The authoress' choice should be last for a big finale, aru.

Misognome: QUESTIONS IT IS! I would like to thank my helpful personality family for these questions… since they are the only people who came to the show and agreed to help… FIRST QUESTION IS FOR: JAPAN! IT READS:

_Dear Japan,_

_Can you tell us about your "rebellious years"?_

_-Ace Octavius_

Japan: *shocked* H-how did you f-f-find out about that?!

Alice "Ace" Octavius: *gets down from her post on the camera thing* I have my sources *looks to door* I'm going on break… gotta help my dad test some guns out *walks out and looks over her shoulder*POISON! TAKE CARE OF THE CAMERA WHILE IM GONE!

Poison: *jumps to Alice's spot* ON IT!

Misognome: well…? Are you going to tell us or not?

Japan: No.

Misognome: Tell us at least one thing about it!

Japan: *sighs* I'll just say I was obsessed with my appearance

China: *glares at Japan* obsessed my ass, aru… You would spend 5 hours in front of the damn mirror FIXING YOUR HAIR, ARU! THAT MIRROR WAS LIKE YOUR DRUG, ARU!

Misognome: Wow… I didn't think he had it in him…

Atlantis: I feel so ignored…

Misognome: Well, this next question is from you, so you can read it

Atlantis: YESSSSS! Okay, this is for Germany. It says:

_HEEEEEEEYYYY GERMANY!_

_CAN YOU SHARE THAT LITTLE "INCIDENT" THAT HAPPENED AT THE SPARKLE PARTY LAST WEEKEND? K THX BYE!_

_-ATLANTIS_

Misognome: WAIT. WHAT "INCIDENT"?

Atlantis: *whispers something in my ear*

Misognome: .O/O. No way… THE SHIP HAS SET SAIL

America: *gets up* what ship?

Misognome: / *fangirl squealing so hard right now*

Atlantis: I'm gonna go get some coffee *walks out of room*

Germany: *face turns bright red* I really don't want to talk about that…

Misognome: *regains seriousness* this is ELF CENTRAL as we all know, and YOU have to answer **ANY **and **ALL** questions we ask you

Germany: *maroon face* nonononononononono

Misognome: Fine… *death glare (aka: "BITCH YOU BETTER FUCKIN' RUN OR ELSE YOURE A DEAD MAN" face)*we can do this the easy way *holds up table lamp* or the hard way *holds up staff*

Germany: FINE, FINE, MEIN GOTT! I drank WAY too much and, well, um basically, um, me and Italy *BEEEEEEEEEEEP*

Audience members who ship GerIta: *NOSEBLEED*

China, England, and America: *goes into fetal position* nonononononononono

Japan: *nosebleed*

Misognome: Um… that was censored… let's go to a commercial break to let everyone recover from that

~commercial break~

BLOOD REMOVER: Misognome buys!

WOOD-DRELF SEDATIVE: Atlantis buys!

PUPPY THEREPY PICTURES: China, England, and America buys!

TISSUSES: Everyone who ships GerIta and Japan buys!

~commercial break end~

*we return to the show to see China curled up in a little ball, clutching a Hello Kitty doll, America hugging a stuffed burger, Japan is drawing dirty pictures, Germany is still VERY red from the embarrassing question, and England is nowhere to be seen*

Atlantis: I come back from the kitchen, and I see a traumatized America and China and Japan drawing… what is that? *looks at japans drawings* *NOSEBLEED* omigod. So hot.*covering nosebleed, so it doesn't get on the drawings* Quick Question, where's Iggy?

Misognome: In the bathroom, puking his tiny brain out, why?

Atlantis: Just wondering… how about we move to the next question?

Misognome: Sure! Okay, this is for America.

_AMERI-CHAN!_

_DO YOU WANT TO HAVE A BURGGER EATING CONTEST WITH ME?_

_-Misognome_

America: *immediately perks up* HELL YES! I CAN BEAT YOU IN A BURGER EATING CONTEST ANY DAY! CUZ IM TE HERO!

Misognome: oh god, the grammar and spelling at the end was terrible. So, how about we have the burger eating contest now?

America: SURE.

Misognome: BRING IN THE TOFU BURGERS!

*a girl, about 14, walks in with a cart of tofu burgers. She has shoulder length, curly, flaming red hair, and bright red dragon wings. Her eyes are a sparkly green with light green flecks and her canine teeth are slightly poking out of her mouth*

Ametris: (the girl I just described) FRESH OFF THE GRILL!

America: I THOUGHT YOU SAID 'BURGER'.

Misognome: I never said what type of burger~

America: I HATE YOU.

Misognome: Love ya to~

England: *walks in, extremely pale* what did I miss?

Atlantis: Not much, but I'd advise you to hold down your lunch until after the burger eating contest.

China: *gets up, still clutching Hello Kitty plush* I don't want to miss this

Japan: *stops drawing his "pictures"* *pulls out camera labeled 'BLACKMAIL'*

Germany: *still bright red from answering the QUESTION*

Atlantis: READY! SET! GO!

Misognome: *inhaling burgers*

America: *trying to stomach one*

~le time skip, after all the burgers are eaten~

Misognome: I WON!

America: I DON'T LIKE TOFU BURGERS. NO. JUST, NO.

Misognome: Get over it, woos

America: WOW. YOURE MEAN.

Misognome: And you're an obnoxious, *beeeeeep*, empty minded, unsophisticated, fat, jerk, so there! *sticks out tongue*

England: AW SNAP

America: IM NOT FAT.

Misognome: Tell that to the scale! *hits America with staff*

America: *clutching skull* OW! THAT HURT!

Atlantis: On to the next Question*twitch*! (Thinking: I don't want a full out fight on set… I remember what happened last time)

Misognome: LETS. This one is for… ENGLAND!

_Hey Eyebrows,_

_Are you STILL waiting for your Hogwarts acceptance letter?_

_-Treble Clef & Cici Flat_

England: *nervous sweat* hehe, where would you get that idea?

Misognome: RUSSIA! SOMEONE IS IN DENIAL!

Russia: *walks in* you called, da?

Misognome: Da, now can you please make him cooperate?

Russia: *innocently smiles at England* you will tell the truth, Da?

England: OKAY! FINE! YES, YES I AM! PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!

Misognome: Good Iggy *hands him a cup of tea* now calm yo' tits. *hugs Russia* BESTEST. FRIEND. EVER.

Russia: *walks away* Good bye!

Misognome: BYE! :D ONE LAST QUESTION!

China: it's for me, Isn't It?

Misognome: Yup, and it asks

_China, _

_Are you a guy or a girl? 'Cause you remind me of Crona from Soul Eater._

_-Clock Avon_

_P.S. When people first hear my name they think I'm a boy (just like Ace), so don't worry about your gender being confused. It happens to us all!_

China: Well, I am male. And thank you for that last part, it's true.

Atlantis: ANYWAY…we have dares now! *pulls out basket and looks at dare* O/O Miso, you will love this one.

Misognome: Why?

Atlantis: Just look at it.

Misognome: O/O

Atlantis: Do you want me to read it?

Misognome: O/O Please do.

Atlantis: So, It says:

_HEHE~_

_I dare England to read a USUK fanfic!_

_Nova ;D_

England: Who the hell is Nova?

Misognome: My older sister and least mature one. Wind is probably the only one in my family that isn't weird or crazy, and she's younger than Nova.

England: Oh… and what's a USUK fanfic?

Misognome: *hands him a laptop that has said fan fiction open* just read it.

England: *sits on couch and starts reading it*

~20 minutes later! ~

England: *pale* I would never do that to him… why? Just, WHY?! OH GOD NO!

~5 more minutes…~

England: FUCK THIS! *flips laptop*

Misognome: DUDE! MY WARRENTY JUST ENDED! I HAVE TO BUY ANOTHER ONE! DAMNIT!

Atlantis: WHOA! I'LL PAY FOR THE NEW ONE THIS TIME!

Misognome: *steam coming out of elf ears* Fine.

Atlantis: Let's move on to the next dare before Misognome snaps. *shudder* last time that happened… *pales dramatically* I don't even want to talk about that…

Misognome: LETS.

Atlantis: Ill read this so you can cool down. Remember, OWMMMMMMM OWWWWMMMMM

Misognome: *Plops on the hostess and co hostess couch* *huffs* you're lucky Ati's here… you'd be dead if it weren't for her.

England: *cowers away from me*

Atlantis: *looks over then back at the basket of dares* OW! FUCK! PAPERCUT! PAPERCUT! *pulls out hand, blue blood dripping from finger*

Misognome: *looks over at Atlantis, and bandages her finger*

America: SHE HAS A HEART!

Misognome: YES I DO, CAPTIAN OBVIOUS! I WOULDN'T BE HERE IF I DIDN'T! I LITERALY FEEL THEIR PAIN. IT FUCKING HURTS!

England: Wait, so you can fell if I punched Atlantis?

Misognome: YES. YES I CAN

England: are you three not surprised at this?

China: No, aru. She said Atlantis was part of her **personality** family. Which means: they are her personality traits, so she would feel their pain along with the personality.

Japan: Context clues

Germany: China told me during the burger eating contest.

Poison: FOR EXAMPLE *pinches right arm*

*Poison and I both shout "SHNOWSERITMAILLA" at the same time as a small bruise forms on both of our right arms*

England: O_O wow.

Misognome: *announcer voice* THIS PROVES MISOGNOMES POINT! *normal voice* NOW, next dare!

Atlantis: *dips hand in basket* *pulls out dare* oh hey! This is for the hostess herself!

Misognome: oh shit.

_Hey, SIS!_

_It's us! You know Star and Cog! We dare you to sing your theme song in front of EVERYONE. NO EXCEPTIONS!_

_Star & Cog _

Misognome: oh hell no.

Atlantis: TwT pweese?

Misognome: not the face…

America: WHATS THE FACE?

Misognome: *points to Atlantis* just look…

Atlantis: **TwT**

Audience: AWWWWWWWWW~

Misognome: *sighs in defeat* Fine… (Thoughts: how thehell can a grown woman make such a great kicked puppy face? I'll have to ask her one of these days)

Atlantis:*hands me microphone*

Star & Cog (They are both star elves. If you don't know what that is, look it up on Google): *snickering*

Misognome: *starts singing*

_Misognome:_

_I remember back when I was still in school,  
>these bullies always picked on me, they called me a fool.<br>They knocked me on the ground! (OH!)  
>They rubbed dog poop in my ears! (OW!)<br>They kicked me! (Oh)  
>They punched me! (Ow)<br>They said; "Come and fight, you wimp!" _

_Atlantis:  
>(What'd you do!?)<br>_

_Misognome:  
>I faked I had an injury then I ran away!<br>I ran away, (I ran away)  
>I ran away! (I ran a-eh-eh-eh-eh ran so far away)<br>Danger stared me in the face and I ran away!  
>(Oooh, ooh, ooh ooh, ooh, ooh, I ran away!)<br>The children always laughed at me after that day,  
>when I said I tore my ACL and I ran away!<em>

_Misognome:  
>I was playing one day in my back yard,<br>when I made the perfect snowball, round and smooth and hard.  
>I spotted nasty Ted Jablonski! (Oooh)<br>I let fly the perfect snowball! (Yeah!)  
>It smashed the neighbor's windshield! (Oh-no!)<br>He came out and said; "Who the hell did that!?" _

_Atlantis:  
>(What'd you doo!?) <em>

_Misognome:  
>I pointed at my sister and then I ran away!<br>I ran away, (I ran away)  
>I ran away! (I ran a-eh-eh-eh-eh ran so far away)<br>Danger stared me in the face and I ran away!  
>(Oooh, ooh, ooh ooh, ooh, ooh, I ran away!)<br>My sister was ground for three years and a day,  
>so I said she was adopted and then I ran away! <em>

_Misognome:  
>I was walking with my best friends one night, (Aww)<br>two guys were sitting on a bench, they pointed at one and said;  
>"she's a fat, ugly tramp!" (Ooh!)<br>"She smells like peanut butter!" (Hey!)  
>"She's a loser!" (OH!)<br>"She's pedantic!" (OI!)  
>"She's a mediocre soccer player!"<br>My best friend said; "Make them stop!" _

_Atlantis:  
>(What'd you doo!?) <em>

_Misognome:  
>I lost my best friend at the spot then I ran away!<br>I ran away, (I ran away)  
>I ran away! (I ran a-eh-eh-eh-eh ran so far away)<br>Danger stared me in the face and I ran away!  
>(Oooh, ooh, ooh ooh, ooh, ooh, I ran away!)<br>The honor of my best friend was one the line that day,  
>so I told my bestie to go away and I ran away! <em>

_Misognome:  
>I was walking by myself last week, (yeah)<br>when the devil himself appeared in front of me. (Oh)  
>He had fire all around him! (AIII!)<br>He smelled like a burning tire dump! (WOOOW!)  
>He opened his mouth and said; "Mike! You're next!" <em>

_Atlantis:  
>(Whaaat'd you doo!?) <em>

_Misognome:  
>I came up to the devil! (Oh yeah!)<br>I poked the devil on the shoulder! (That's right!)  
>I said look over there, and then I ran away!<br>I ran away, (I ran away)  
>I ran away! (I ran a-eh-eh-eh-eh ran so far away)<br>Danger stared me in the face and I ran away!  
>(Oooh, ooh, ooh ooh, ooh, ooh, I ran away!)<br>I'm hoping that the devil smokes two packs a day,  
>Cause my day of reckoning is here and I ran away!<em>

_I ran away, (I ran away)_  
><em>I ran away! (I ran a-eh-eh-eh-eh ran so far away)<em>  
><em>Danger stared me in the face and I ran away!<em>  
><em>(Oooh, ooh, ooh ooh, ooh, ooh, I ran away!)<em>  
><em>Whenever I was challenged I collapsed like a soufflé,<em>  
><em>but I'm still alive to sing this song cause I ran away!<em>

_Oh yes I ran,_  
><em>(Oh yes he ran!)<em>  
><em>Oh yes I ran,<em>  
><em>(Oh yes he ran!)<em>  
><em>I ran away!<em>

England, America, Germany, Japan, and China: O.O whoa…

Misognome: *out of breath* my… god… it takes… a… lot to… sing… comedy…

Atlantis: *pats my back* you done well, you put 5 people into shock with that amazing song

Germany: That song reminds me of someone I know

Misognome: Next Dare! It's for Japan!

_Heeeeeeeeeeeeeey Japan!_

_I dare you to take off your shirt!_

_-BL4_

America: WHOS "BL4"?

Misognome: it's actually 4 people. Heaven (Angelica), Hell (Hailey), Limbo (Lillia), and Atlantis

England: Would those people happen to be the ones playing with black cats, opening umbrellas inside, walking under ladders, and breaking mirrors?

Misognome: Yes… why?

England well when I was running to the bathroom, I passed by them.

Misognome: IRELAND! GET THE FOUR LEAF CLOVERS AND ANYTHING THAT'S LUCKY AND THROW IT AT IGGY! HE PASSED "THEM"

Ireland: *throws horseshoes at England's face* DONE!

Misognome: Addis soldier!

Ireland: *walks away*

Japan: Can you repeat my dare, please?

Misognome: *Looks it over* it says to take off your shirt.

Japan: but, that is disrespecting my ancestors!

Misognome: Chinas basically your dad and that's, like, the only ancestor you have. Plus he's sitting right here. *points at China*

Japan: fine… *takes off shirt*

Misognome: JAPAN!

Japan: What?

Misognome: I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD ABS!

Japan:?

Misognome: Very few have seen you shirtless… IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRICALE!

Atlantis: It's October.

Misognome: fine. IT'S A HALLOWS EVE MIRICALE!

Japan fan girls in the audience: *droooooooooooool*

Misognome: Please put your shirt on, I don't want to have to clean that shit up.

Japan: *puts shirt back on*

Atlantis: *snaps out of trance* sorry, I zoned out looking at japans abs

Misognome: wow… NEXT DARE!

Atlantis: THIS IS FOR, America!

America: HAVENT I SUFFERED ENOUGH TODAY?

Misognome: Nope~

_¡Hola!_

_América,__me atrevo__a ir__una semana entera__sin comer__hamburguesas__!_

_Ametris_

Atlantis: Misognome, you can read Spanish, right?

Misognome: yea, why?

Atlantis: Well, you know how Ametris is Spanish?

Misognome: Yes… where is this leading?

Atlantis: she wrote the dare in Spanish.

Misognome: *looks at paper* It says:

_Hello!_

_America, I dare you to go a whole week without eating hamburgers!_

_Ametris_

Japan: Are you bilingual?

Misognome: I know the basics of Spanish.

America: *jaw hits floor* NO. JUST NO. THAT'S EVEN WORSE THAN TOFU BURGERS.

Misognome: *raises staff threateningly* BITCH. YOU WILL DO AS I SAY. I REALLY MEAN IT WHEN I SAY I WILL FEED YOU TO THE FAN GIRLS. ASK ATI, I CAN AND WILL GIVE YOU A CUNCUSSION.

Atlantis: It's true. It happened to France when he got a bit to "touchy-feely" with her. *pats my back* I raised her right *proud face*

England: You have a very strange family…

Misognome: I know! :D

China: I feel ignored…

Germany: Same…

Misognome: Don't worry you two, your dares are next!

Atlantis: So, America, Would you like a concussion or to lose some weight?

America: SECOND CHOISE.

Misognome: NO HAMBURGERS FOR YOU.

Atlantis: NEXT DARE!

America: *upset about not being able to eat burgers*

Atlantis: You'll lose weight, you decrease your chances for diabetes, *goes on about the positive things*

Misognome: *conjures paper out of thin air* this reads:

_Germany!_

_I-a dare you-a to sing-a "Disco Pogo"!_

_-Italy!_

England: ITALY ISNT PART OF YOU PERSONALITY FAMILY!

Misognome: He said he had a good dare for Germany, so I let him put it in the show! :D

Germany: No.

Misognome: OLLIE!

2p!England: Yes, poppet?

Misognome: *whispers something in his ear*

2p!England: Of course! *leaves and comes back with a cupcake* Here you go! *innocent smile*

Misognome: AWWWW~ so innocent!

2p!England: If that's all…*leaves*

Misognome: *shouts to him* YOU CAN USE THE OVEN TO BAKE CUPCAKES!

Atlantis: You can now let that fangirl squeal you've been holding in for so long out

Misognome: *FANGIRL SQUEALING*

Atlantis: You good?

Misognome: Never better~

China: Wow. I guess it is true that 2p!England puts her in a good mood after talking with him.

Misognome: *hands the 'innocent' cupcake to Germany with an 'innocent' smile* Eat it! :D

Germany: No.

Misognome: *doesn't listen and shoves cupcake down his throat* I said: EAT IT! *creepy smile*

Atlantis: O.O Now I know why she gets along better with the 2p!'s

Germany: *swallows cupcake* WHAT THE HELL WAS- *obviously high* ohhhhhh I see pretty flowers~

Misognome: Soooo… Now will you sing German Sparkle Party?

Germany: of course~

Misognome: Go ahead~ the microphone awaits~

Germany: *grabs Microphone* *starts singing*

_Was ist los?_  
><em>Es ist Party angesagt!<em>

_Die Saison ist eröffnet._  
><em>Es ist ein wahres Spektakel,<em>  
><em>denn alle kommen, weil es abgeht.<em>  
><em>Das ist 'ne rießen große Party!<em>

_Reißt die Arme in den Himmel_  
><em>und schwenkt sie über den Kopf,<em>  
><em>man wir sind erst am Ziel,<em>  
><em>wenn der Schweis von der Decke tropft.<em>

_Die Wände schwitzen,_  
><em>alle springen, alles was wir lieben.<em>  
><em>Wir lassen uns das gottverdammte Feiern<em>  
><em>nicht verbieten.<em>

_Wie ein kranker Haufen raufen wir_  
><em>und Atzen lassen es krachen.<em>  
><em>Die Spieser sind geschockt<em>  
><em>und packen ganz schnell ihre Sachen.<em>

_Wir lassen uns nicht verarschen,_  
><em>Wir tanzen und wir toben.<em>  
><em>Hebt die Hände nach oben!<em>  
><em>Und dann lasst uns Diso-pogen!<em>

_(DISCOPOGO)_

_Discopogo_  
><em>Dingelingeling<em>  
><em>Dingelingeling<em>  
><em>Alle Atzen sing'!<em>  
><em>Discopogo<em>  
><em>Dingelingeling<em>  
><em>Dingelingeling<em>  
><em>Alle Atzen sing'!<em>

_Die Masse rockt,_  
><em>wir sind bekloppt.<em>  
><em>Wir pogen schockt uns Dr. Rock<em>  
><em>Wir baden in der M-M-Menge,<em>  
><em>darauf hab ich bock.<em>  
><em>Voll normal f-f-feiern mit,<em>  
><em>ich fass mir auch mal in den Schritt.<em>  
><em>Breakdance oder Atzentanz,<em>  
><em>wir tanzen heut' den Pogo Hit!<em>  
><em>Discopogo, Atzenlogo,<em>  
><em>Atzenstyle ist Discopogo!<em>  
><em>Atzen rasten nicht am Tag,<em>  
><em>sie feiern mit dem Atzenlogo.<em>  
><em>Schubsen, Drücken, Hüpfen, Springen, Raufen, Saufen, Tanzen, Pogen.<em>

_Atzenparty Dingeling._  
><em>Atzenparty Dingeling.<em>  
><em>Atzenparty Dingeling.<em>  
><em>Atzenparty Dingeling.<em>

_DISCOPOGEN UNSER DING!_  
><em>DISCOPOGEN UNSER DING!<em>

_Pogen (ca. 35x)_  
><em>Di Di Di Di Di Di Di Di Disco Pogo!<em>  
><em>Di Di Di Di Di Di Di Di Disco Pogo!<em>

_Discopogo_  
><em>Dingelingeling.<em>  
><em>Dingelingeling.<em>  
><em>Alle Atzen sing'!<em>

_Discopogo_  
><em>Dingelingeling.<em>  
><em>Dingelingeling.<em>  
><em>Alle Atzen sing'!<em>

Misognome: *clapping as Germany passes out on the floor*

Atlantis: What did he put in that cupcake? *suspicious*

2P!England:*from kitchen* SHES ON TO US! RUN AL, RUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!

Atlantis: *picks Germany up* *throws him on the couch*imma just… gonna leave him there till he wakes up…

Misognome: Yea… please do. NEXT!

_HI__Ĉinio!__  
><em>_Mi aŭdacas__vin__forĵeti__unu el viaj__hello__kitty__plushies__!_

_ -Destiny Kirkland :D_

China: Translation, please.

America: HEY IGGY, IT'S FROM YOUR SISTER!

England: She's not my sister. I don't have any sisters, only three other brothers.

Misognome: She's my sister… baka…

Japan: *snicker*

Atlantis: She's speaking Esperanto… crap. If she was using Latin, I would be able to understand.

Misognome: It says;

_HI China!_

_I dare you to throw away one of your hello kitty plushies!_

_-Destiny Kirkland :D_

Japan: How did you understand that?

Misognome: four words; I. live. With. Her.

Atlantis: Same here, but I never talk to her.

Misognome: she should be her in 3… 2… 1…

Destiny: Hej partio popoloj! (Hey party people!)

Misognome: Saluton Destiny. Kiel vi fartas hodiaŭ? (Hello Destiny. How are you today?)

Destiny: Fajna, dankon pro demandi! vi? (Fine, thanks for asking! you?)

Misognome: Granda ... nur granda ... (Great... just great...)

Destiny: Vi ŝajnas ... for ... kial? (You seem... off... why?)

Misognome: Mi pusxis tie ... (I'm stuck here...)

Destiny: oh ... kio pri vi prenos ripozon? (Oh... how about you take a break?)

Misognome: kiu metas min de estas bone kun mi! (Anything that gets me away from here is okay with me!)

England: What the bloody hell is she saying?

Atlantis: It sounds like… Esperanto… DAMN IT ALL!

Misognome: I and Destiny are going on our break.

Atlantis: DON'T LEAVE ME HERE!

Misognome: to late *magically disappears*

Atlantis: *looks at spot where I just was* that bitch… any ways, China, sorry buddy, one of your Hello kitties has to go…

China: *Dramatic* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Atlantis: IM SO SORRY! UNCLE, FORGIVE ME, FOR I HAVE SINNED!

China: *cries into sleeve as he hands over a hello kitty plush*

Atlantis: *sadly tosses it in a garbage bag*

Japan: I've never seen China cry before… it's upsetting…

Atlantis: I don't want people watching/reading Elf central to see me cry. COMMERCIAL BREAK!

~commercial break~

TICKETS TO DISNEYLAND: Misognome buys as a treat for the whole cast of Elf central!

TISSUES: China buys! *out of stock*

STAFFS: Misognome buys!

HARPOONS: Atlantis buys!

~commercial end~

Misognome: AND WERE BACK!

Atlantis: 'BOUT DAMN TIME!

Misognome: IT'S AUTHORESS' CHOICE ROUND! I HAVE TO BE HERE ANGELI!

Atlantis: DON'T CALL ME THAT!

Misognome: fine… FIRST OFF IS *builds suspense* IGGY!

England: DON'T-

Misognome: *slaps him* SHUSH! YOU WILL BE WEARING AN OUTFIT THAT ATLANTIS, POLAND AND I CHOOSE FOR YOU!

England: *holds cheek* BLOODY HELL, SHES ON STEROIDS!

Misognome: No, Drugs are bad. They do bad things to a person's body, mind and health. DON'T DO DRUGS! AND, IM Just naturally that strong.

Atlantis: I raised her to be strong. Now, GO CHANGE! *points to dressing room door*

England: *grumbles about something and walks into the dressing room, closing the door and locking it*

Atlantis: *calls after him* DON'T FORGET THE WIG!

Misognome: viewers who do not like cross dressing, Leave now. Or skip it. I don't care. Just don't hurt me for it.

~15 minutes later~

*England comes out wearing a long, blonde wig with a bright pink bow and a PINK (Thanks Poland!) Japanese schoolgirl outfit*

Misognome: *wolf whistle* you look SOOOO sexy!

Atlantis: *nosebleed*

England: Why did I agree to this?

Misognome: You didn't. I forced you to. NOW DANCE LIKE YOUR INNER SCHOOL GIRL!

England: No.

Misognome: *raises staff* DANCE

England: FINE! *starts dancing*

Atlantis: *snapping pictures*

Misognome: Hey, can I have a couple of those Atlantis? (Thinking: these are going in the book of "Blackmail") *quiet evil laugh*

Atlantis: Sure!

Misognome: Now, GERMANY!

Germany: yes?

Misognome: You have to do Caramelldancen!

Germany: um… Is it shameful to say that Prussia got me to do that while I was drunk off my ass…

Misognome: No. It's not.

Germany: … And he got it all on video?

Misognome: Do you have it?

Germany: …yes…

Misognome: hand it over

Germany: no.

Misognome: *raises staff* Now.

Germany: *hands a small video camera over*

Misognome: *presses the replay button*

~*VIDEO*~

Prussia: *totally sober and holding the camera* hey West

Germany: *slurred* YEEEEESSSS?

Prussia: Do caramelldancen. Kesese~

Germany: SURRRRE THINNNNNG BRUDTHER! *starts doing a drunken caramelldancen while knocking over a table and breaking it* *stops dancing and looks at the table* NOOOOO! HE WAS SOOO YOUNG! *clutches broken table leg and starts sobbing*

Prussia: kesesesesesesesesesesesesesesese~

~*VIDEO END*~

Misognome: PFFFFFFFFFFFFT AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Atlantis: *rolling on the couch, laughing her ass off*

Germany: *hanging head in shame* why?

Misognome: *giggling* okay, *snicker* America!

America: *snaps out of daydream* THE HERO IS HERE

Misognome: OKAY! You can call yourself a Hero for the rest of the day

America: D: I CAN'T DO THAT. IM BATMA-NEVERMIND. PRETEND I DIDN'T JUST SAY THAT.

Misognome: sure… Japan!

Japan: Hai!

Misognome: You have to drink 20 cups of Sake!

Japan: um… you know I have a low tolerance with alcohol

Misognome: I know :D I'm just curious to see what would happen

Atlantis: *passes out from nosebleed*

Misognome: Iggy, you can stop dancing now… you're going to send people to the hospital if you keep flashing them in that outfit…

England: good *sits down on the couch, next to America*

Misognome: USUK ALERT!

England: OH GOD NO! *moves next to Germany* NO FANSERVICE!

Misognome: Now, Japan. To drink, or get hit with my staff multiple times, that is the question…

Japan: FIRST CHOISE!

Misognome's thoughts: He's never brought his voice above a whisper… I must have scared him… good… :D

Atlantis: *wakes up* *wipes nosebleed away*

Misognome: Good, You're awake… :D

Atlantis: *looks at frightened Japan* you scared him good…

Misognome: GET THE SAKE!

Atlantis: *apperifys a Jug of sake* what do you need this for?

Misognome: *grabs jug and hands it to Japan* now, DRINK!

~one LARGE jug of sake later~

Japan: *waving shirt in the air* WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! EVERYBODY WAS KUNG FU FIGHTING! *karate kicks America in the face*

Misognome: (O.O) um… okay then… moving on…

Japan: OLD GODZILLA WAS HOPPIN' AROUND TOKYO CITY LIKE A BIG PLAYGROUND! SPRING BREEEEAK! WOOOOOOOOOOO!

Misognome: CHINA! I CHOOSE YOU!

China: Please don't treat me like a Pokémon…

Misognome: Anyways, can you make me some Chinese rice? I'm hungry…

China: sure… (Thinking: she is an odd one… making the others do embarrassing things but asking me to make her food… she's planning something) *leaves room to go to the kitchen*

Misognome: (thinking: GRRR MAKING PEOPLE DO EMBARESSING SHIT IS MAKING ME HUNGRY!) *stomach growls loudly*

Atlantis: wow… you are hungry

China: *comes back with a bowl of Chinese rice* done!

Misognome: THANK YOU SO MUCH! I WAS GOING TO EAT THE CAMERA! *starts eating rice*

Atlantis: I guess this is the end of this episode/chapter/thing/ whatever the hell this is! SEE YOU NEXT TIME! *waves bye to the camera*

Misognome: *stops eating rice* yea, bye *continues eating rice*

* * *

><p><strong>Misognome: I'm gonna end it here… I'm getting hungry… so yea… ADIOS!<strong>

**P.S. I NEED RIDICULOUS DARES, RANDOM QUESTIONS AND SUGESTIONS FOR WHAT I CAN DO BETTER! I MEAN, I KNOW THAT THEY ARE OOC BUT I TRIED! FLAMES WILL BE USED TO BURN THE BODIES OF THOSE WHO SEND THEM (AFTER THE PEOPLE OF THE POTATO CLAN SKIN THEM WITH POTATO PEELERS!)**

**P.P.S. the songs I used were:**

**-I Ran Away: the Arrogant Worms (I altered the lyrics a bit… it said "girlfriend" so I changed it to "best friend" since, you know, I have a nonexistent love life)**

**-Disco pogo: Frauenarzt & Manny Marc**

**YAY! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAMER: **I DON'T DUN DIDDLY OWN HETALIA OR THE CHARACTERS IN HETALIA. THOSE BELONG TO HIDEKAZU HIMARUYA. (I wish I did though…)

*The show starts, as usual, with the shitty music. I am curled up in a little ball, on the hostess and co-hostess's couch, listening to music and writing on a sheet of paper. Atlantis is nowhere to be seen and the victim- I mean- contestants are sitting on a couch across from me and England is cowering in fear from me*

America: I HAVE A COUPLE QUESTIONS.

Misognome: And I have answers

America: FIRST; WHERES ATLANTIS?

Misognome: WELL, we were playing hide and seek in the Smithsonian museum, and we somehow lost Ati…

~*AT THE MUSEUM*~

Star: WHERE THE HELL IS ATI?!

~*BACK WITH US*~

Misognome: ...And I had to call in a friend to help out…

America: SECONDLY; WHAT ARE YOU WRITING?

Misognome: My math homework

America: AND FINALLY; WHY IS ENGLAND HIDING FROM YOU?

Misognome: WELL…

~*FLASHBACK*~

*we come to an unknown home- no wait- tree. A fairly large tree actually. Music is blasting from the open windows and the smell of chocolate cake fills the air. This appears to be the Home of The Authoress and her personality family, along with her good friend, windy-rose8. They appear to be doing this strange dance called "The Time Warp" and singing along to the music off key*

Windy-rose8 and Misognome: *so off-key* LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETS DOOOOOOOOOOO THE TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEE WAAAAARP AGAAAAAAAAIN! (/^.^)/ \(^.^\)

Door: *KNOCK KNOCK BITCHES*

Misognome: *stops dancing* ITS OPEN!

England: *opens door cautiously*

Misognome: *goes back to dancing* ITS JUST A JUMP TO THE LEFT! AND A STEP TO THE RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! PUT YOUR HANDS ON YOUR HIPS! AND MOVE YOUR KNEES IN TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT! *continues dancing and singing until I hit a table* OW! FUCK!

Windy-rose8: *stops dancing* Hi~

England: hi… did I come at a bad time?

Misognome: *gets up, a lamp shade on my head* HI IGGY! YOU WANNA DANCE WITH US?

England: *sweat drop* um… no thanks

Windy-rose8: Miso-Chan, calm down!

Misognome: *keeps dancing* NO WAY, WOMAN!

England: what's with her?

Windy-rose8: *pinches the bridge of her nose* I made her coffee cake, with caffeinated coffee, totally forgetting her low caffeine tolerance, and gave her a slice. Now, in an attempt to calm her down, I've been dancing with her, hoping that she'll pass out…

Misognome: *pokes England's cheek* why is there a flying mint bunny next to you?

England: *raises eyebrow* you can see him?

Misognome: yea… *yawns* man, I'm really tired

Windy-rose8: FINALLY!

England: Anyways, why did you call me over?

Misognome: Windy is going to teach you to bake! / (.-.)\

Windy-rose8: sorry to say… your baking sucks…

Misognome: yeah! You made Ati extremely sick! She had to get her stomach pumped!

Windy-rose8: The same thing happened to you when you ate his scones

Misognome: yeah, it did…well if you need me; I'll be doing… things…

Windy-rose8: (o_e) did you…?

Misognome: yea… (._. )

Windy-rose8: *grabs England's arm* yea… you do "that" *drags England into the kitchen*

Misognome: he's only unconscious!

Windy-rose8: sure…

Misognome: *runs out of room*

~*five minutes later in the flashback*~

*sounds of screams and a chainsaw are heard throughout the Tree home*

England: *stops stirring batter* (o.e) the fuck was that?

Windy-rose8: you don't want to know…

~*five MORE minutes later in the flashback*~

*the noises have stopped*

England: *goes to living room (the cake is baking!) to see me (through the window) drop kicking 2p!America into a river* \(;O_O)/ OH GOD, FUCK THIS! *runs out of house, screaming*

Misognome: *comes back inside* …did he see that…?

Windy-rose8: (o.e) yes, you strange psycho child!

Misognome: I'm not a psychopath; I'm just a high functioning sociopath!

Windy-rose8: *steps back a bit* yea… you keep telling yourself that…

~*flashback end*~

Misognome: so, yea… he's still alive… I kicked him in his Florida Keys and put him in a shallow stream.

China, Japan, and Germany: (thinking: note to self, do not get on hostesses bad side… drop kicks, chainsaws, and rivers are involved) O.e what is wrong with you?

Misognome: The real question is: What is not wrong with me? *psychotic laugh*

America: (O.e) YOU ARE A STRANGE CHILD… PSYCHO

Misognome: I'm not a psychopath; I'm just a high functioning sociopath!

America: SURE…

Misognome: anyways… I was thinking… since its going to be Halloween soon, we should go to a haunted house! Plus, windy-rose8 is coming with us!

England: *somewhere in the rafters* is she Ati's temporary replacement?

Misognome: yes, my evil mastermind of a friend is co-hosting! (^w^)

England: *SHREIK* SHE SEES ME!

Windy-rose8: *appears out of nowhere* she isn't gonna kill you… your one of her favorite countries and she's going to visit England for spring break

Misognome: *glomps her* YAY! I MISSED YOU!

Windy-rose8: well, you said we were going to a haunted house, so, LETS GO (^-^)

Misognome: Germany, can you drive?

Germany: sure…?

Misognome: yay!

Japan: I don't mean to pry, but why aren't we doing the usual; question, dare, then authoresses' choice?

Misognome: um… we didn't get enough questions or dares…

Japan: oh…

Misognome: OH! That reminds me! Here you go China! *hands China a hello kitty plushie*

China: *fanboy squeal* *squeezes plushie* THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!

Windy-rose8: um… o…kay then…

Misognome: your welcome~ Numa numa, don't underestimate the power of Hello Kitty

Windy-rose8: Ati was right, you are batshit crazy. Did you hit your head or something?

Misognome: well… I did fall down the stairs, on my butt, at school. But other than that, I haven't hit my head anywhere.

America: LIES!

Misognome: oh yea, I hit my head on a pole, while walking up the stairs, at school when I was coming back from band…

Windy-rose8: *raises eyebrow* wow, really?

Misognome: yea… I know I'm a total klutz, AND IM PROUD!

Windy-rose8: *sigh* you really are crazy…

America: SHE ISNT JUST CRAZY, SHES A CRAZY FREAK

Misognome: what was your first clue?

Windy-rose8: …I swear nothing fazes this girl

Misognome: SO! Let's get down to bizwitz! We are going to a haunted house and are going to spend a full night there. The challenge is: whoever runs out first has to go to people's houses after the show, in a bear suit, and dance like an idiot in there yard!

America: COUNT ME IN! IM GONNA BE THE HERO!

Misognome: I thought you were gonna make a Pokémon joke there…

Windy-rose8: I know right?

Misognome: well then, China? Japan? Germany? Iggy?

China, Japan, Germany, And England: sure…?

Misognome & Windy-rose8: *parading out the door* WERE OFF TO SEE THE WIZARD! THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ!

England: *comes out of the rafters* so, we're stuck with those two for a whole night in a haunted house? This'll be fun… *sarcasm*

China: *follows behind us, dragging Japan and squeezing the life out of the Hello Kitty*

Germany: *poker faces out the door* better catch up before they blow up the car again…

England: again?

Germany: I left them alone by the car, as I went to pick up Prussia from the bar, and next thing I know, BOOM, the car was gone and those two were covered in ash and laughing like idiots…

England and America: *walk out the door*

*a loud boom was heard throughout the building along with loud, psychotic giggles*

Germany: MEIN GOTT! AGAIN?! *runs after noise*

~*five or so minutes later*~

Misognome: *ears flattened, being scolded by Germany*

Windy-rose8: (THINKING: jeez… what a party pooper, that was a shitty car that didn't work anymore… and the fact that I'm the Esper that blew it up doesn't help…)

Germany: WHY DID YOU BLOW UP THE CAR?!

Misognome: *on the brink of tears* I'm sorry…

Germany: SORRY ISNT GOING TO PAY FOR A NEW CAR!

Misognome: *lets a few tears fall* I'm sorry…

Germany: THAT WON'T PAY FOR A NEW WALL EITHER!

Misognome: *starts sobbing hysterically* IMSORRYIMSORRYIMSORRY!

Windy-rose8: *glares at Germany* YOU MONSTER! *hugs me* shhhh, shhhh, its okay…

America: NOT COOL, DUDE. NOT. COOL.

Misognome: *calms down after a couple minutes of crying* *bitch slaps Germany* POTATO-EATING BASTARD!

~*somewhere in *~

Romano: *stops picking tomatoes* I have a feeling that someone, that wasn't me, just called Germany a "potato-eating bastard…" hmmm… must be my imagination… *goes back to picking tomatoes*

~*back with us*~

Windy-rose8: (O_o ') did someone from her personality family forget to mention that you SHOULDN'T EVER make her cry?

America: YES. YES THEY DID.

Misognome: YOU BITCH! HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME HAVE A BREAK DOWN IN THE PARKING LOT OF THE ELF CENTRAL STUDIO?!

Windy-rose8: (O.O) SHIT JUST HIT THE FAN! *cowers behind America, who, along with the other countries, is backing away*

Misognome: YoU jUsT mEsSeD wItH tHe WrOnG pErSoN. :o) HoNk HoNk, MoThErFuCkEr. *raises staff in the air*

Germany: *runs off screaming like a little girl*

Misognome: *snicker* Gamzee, ftw!

Windy-rose8: no more Homestuck for you, Miso…

Misognome: but… but… I'm on act 6!

Windy-rose8: you know; I feel like I'm acting too much like your mom…

Misognome: yea, you are…

China: wait… HOW old are you two

Misognome: um… I don't wanna say…

Windy-rose8: … *unresponsive*

China: o…kay then

Misognome: we lost our driver, so who's going to drive?

England: I'll drive.

America: SHOTGUN!

Misognome: damn it… I wanted shotgun. Oh well…

Windy-rose8: did acting like Gamzee tire you out?

Misognome: yea

Windy-rose8: well, get in the car; the sooner we get there, the sooner you can sleep

Misognome: sure thing, MOM

Windy-rose8: you did not just cross that line…

Misognome: OH YES I DID!

Windy-rose8: *throws me in the car* *sits next to me* I'm not your mom…

Misognome: You're right,*points to lady crossing the street* that's my mom *waves*

Lady/Mom: *waves back*

China: *jumps in the car, dragging Japan with him*

Japan: *flipping out about his personal bubble being invaded*

Germany: *comes back to the group* *shoves England out of the driver's seat* Miso, I swear, if you even try to hurt me, you're getting a cap in your brain.

England: WANKER!

Misognome: I don't have a brain though… it's an enchanted potato named Pedro…

Windy-rose8: *whispers to me* is this normal?

Misognome: *whispers back* for what?

Windy-rose8:*whisper* for them to throw empty threats at you

Misognome: *normal voice* yea, it is.

Germany: what were you two talking about?

Misognome: NOTHING! LET'S GET GOING! *eye twitches*

America: YEA!

England: sure...

China: (^3^) *happy about the Hello Kitty plushie*

Japan: Hai!

Windy-rose8: *fist bumps me* FOR THE POTATO CLAN

Misognome: (^3^) FOR THE POTATO CLAN!

Germany: *starts driving*

~*20 MINUTES OF DRIVING LATER*~

*we arrive at an old, abandoned asylum. The windows are shattered and the shards of glass are stained red. The trees in the front yard are dead, giving it a creepy aura, and the walls are caving in*

Germany: We're here. But it isn't night time yet…

Misognome: I can fix that *calls someone on windy-rose8's phone* yea, it's me… favor for a favor, remember... We swore on the Pirates code… yes, we did… it is fall down here… Okay! *ends call* keep your eye on the sky, peeps!

Everyone: *looks at sky*

Sun: *gets shoved out of the sky by the moon*

Moon: *waves to me*

Misognome: *waves back*

Everyone else: *weirded out*

Misognome: what? I get more weird than you get free in your box of fruit loops

Windy-rose8: that's… actually true

Misognome: *walking to the front door and opening it*

Windy-rose8: (O.O) she usually makes me go first when it comes to scary things

America: *shaking like a leaf*

Misognome: *peeks inside* OOO! SHINY THING! *runs inside*

Windy-rose8: *runs after me* NO! IT COULD BE A TRAP!

Everyone else: *walks in*

Misognome: *looking at something in the floor with a horrified expression*

Germany: what is it?

Misognome: s-s -severed f-f-f-fingers

Germany: *looks at the thing on the floor* its only worms

Misognome: well I'm sorry, my night vision hasn't kicked in yet *snarky*

Windy-rose8: wait… elves have night vision?

Misognome: actually, yes. We have night vision. And once it kicks in, I'll be able to walk around here without a flashlight. Come to think of it, did I put flashlights in the trunk?

Windy-rose8: *shrugs*

Misognome: well, I'm gonna go find some blankets and pillows… *walks away, bumping into a wall in the process* ow

Windy-rose8: I'll get the flashlights. Someone prop open the door with a chair. *walks out

Germany:*pulls out pistols and holds the door open*

America: *hiding under a table*

Japan: *sits down on one of the couches*

China: *hugging the Hello Kitty*

England: *reading a book of spells*

~*5 MINUTES LATER*~

Misognome: guys were all gonna have the luxury OF… sleeping on the floor tonight *throws confetti in the air*

Windy-rose8: don't worry! *runs inside with sleeping bags, flashlights, pillows, and my staff*

America: *grabs sleeping bag and hides in it*

Misognome: *grabs staff, pillow and sleeping bag* I'm sleeping on that table over there *walks to a table next to a window* and if I feel threatened tonight, I'm out, bitch. I don't care if I have to wear the bear suit; I'm out this window faster than you can say "pasta"

England: *still reading spell book in the chair*

Misognome: oh yea, these couches are filled with dust, beetles, and worms

England and Japan: *jump out of their seats* AAAHHH

Misognome: oh, and while I was wandering, my night vision kicked in

China: *squeezing the life out of the Hello Kitty plush*

~*TIME SKIP*~

*everyone set up camp, I sprinkled salt by all the entrances and exits, England put a protection spell on everyone (almost turning Windy-rose8 into a frog), America is cowering behind me, Japan is drawing in a pad of paper he had with him, and China is talking with Germany*

Misognome: *nervously singing* anytime you feel alone, put on your headphones… *nervous laughter*

England: What happened to her?

Windy-rose8: When she *points to me singing nervously* gets scared, she'll start to sing. She says it helps calm her down.

Closed door: *opens*

Misognome: *SHRIEK* WHO THE FUCK OPENED THAT DOOR?!

*psychotic, child-like giggles are heard throughout the building*

Everyone (except me, whom is having a panic attack): *looks to the door* (;O_O)

Misognome: *rocking back and forth in the corner, while nervously singing* when there's something strange, in yo' neighborhood, who you gonna call? *nervous laughter* ghost busters!

America: *looks like he just pissed his pants*

Windy-rose8: *in the corner with me* it's just the wind, it's just the wind *something touches her shoulder* *SHRIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEKKKKK*

Misognome: (TT w TT) *even more nervous singing* somewhere over the rainbow…

England: *nervous laughter*

Germany: *pulls hammer back on his gun* nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, not getting kidnapped by a ghost today

China and Japan: *hugging each other, scared out of their minds*

*more psychotic giggles are heard along with a child singing: "ring-around-the-rosy, pock-et full of posy, ashes, assshhhess, we all fall down" at the word down, the door busts off its hinges and hits the wall behind England*

Misognome & Windy-rose8: (TTTT W TTTT)

England: (QuQ) I don't wanna die…

America: *looks like he just shit his pants*

Germany: ( ._.) o…kay then

China & Japan: *hugging each other tightly*

Misognome: (Thinks: wait a second… why am I scared?) HOLD THE MOTHERFUCKING PHONE, BROTHER. IF YOU WANT US DEAD, WHY DON'T YOU COME AT US, ARE YOU A FUCKING CHICKEN?!

*****THIS MIGHT GIVE YOU NIGHTMARES IS YOU PICTURE IT*****

*the ghost of a child with no eyes or nose appears. Her mouth is sewn shut and sewn into a permanent smile, and she is holding a knife dripping blood. (Honestly, the top part of her face looks like a corpse while the bottom part looks like a doll)*

Misognome: (O_o) OH FUCK NO! YOU'VE BEEN TRYING TO KILL US?! WHY?! I WANT ANSWERS YOUNG LADY.

Ghost: well… I want a new friend

Misognome: THAT IS NO EXCUSE TO GO AROUND KILLING PEOPLE WHO ENTER. NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM, MISS.

Ghost: but-

Misognome: NO BUTS. ROOM. NOW.

Ghost: But I don't wanna…

Misognome: *twitch* YoU wIlL gO tO yOuR rOoM, yOuNg LaDy. Or ElSe ThE sCaRy MeN iN wHiTe WiLl TaKe YoU aWaY! *violent twitch*

Ghost: (O.O) yes ma'am! *floats/runs away*

Everyone: (o.e) twice in one day…?

Misognome: *straightens shirt* *dusts off hands* done!

Windy-rose8: She never said anything about dropping the fear and going full out Alpha male/warrior/"bitch-you-better-back-the-fuck-up-before-I-break-every-bone-in-your-body-twice" mode…

Misognome: well, I didn't say anything about it because I thought you wouldn't believe me

Windy-rose8: I didn't believe you when you said you sing when you're scared…

Germany: *dumbfounded at the fact that I just scolded a murderous ghost and came out unscathed*

Misognome: Now, Get to sleep everyone! We have a long day tomorrow!

Everyone: You expect us to get to sleep after that?!

Misognome: *looks out window* Look at that, its morning! Time to pack up! Help each other clean up camp! *skips to the table I was supposed to sleep on like nothing ever happened*

Everyone: (-_- ) never… sleeping… again…

~*LE TIMEY WHIMY SKIP*~

*camp was packed up, and we were currently driving back to the studio*

Windy-rose8: Misognome, your good mood is scaring me. Why are you so happy?

Misognome: Before we left, I gave the ghost a present! (^w^)

Windy-rose8: what did you give it?

Misognome: shhhhhhh!

~*with the ghost*~

*the room has a new paint job, there are stuffed animals everywhere, and there is a venus fly trap sitting on the window sill*

Ghost: *playing with stuffed animals* ITS LIKE AN EARLY CHRISTMAS! WOOOOOOOOOO!11!1!1

~*BACK WITH US!*~

Windy-rose8: so you basically did a good deed and you're happy about it?

Misognome: Si!

America: (O-O) SO SHE DOES CARE ABOUT OTHERS…

Misognome: ha. Haha. Yea, no. I don't. I really have no sympathy for others. I felt like I owed her something since I scared the shit out of her with my "murderous psycho mode"

England: *driving* *turns on music*

Music: WHEN THERES SOMETHANG STRAAAANGE IN YO' NEIGHBO'HOOOD, WHO YOU GONNA CALL?

Misognome: GHOSTBUSTERS!

Germany: *facepalm*

~*LE TIME SKAP*~

Misognome: *runs out of the car and inside the studio*

Everyone: *follows*

China: what's with her, aru?

Windy-rose8: I know what's not with her.

America: WHAT IS IT?

Windy-rose8: her sanity…

Misognome: I KNEW SOMETHING WASN'T RIGHT!

England: WHAT IS IT?

Misognome: THE PLACE IS TRASHED!

Windy-rose8: GAAHH! WHOS GONNA CLEAN IT UP?!

Misognome: *growl* POISON!

Poison: yea?

Misognome: YOU ARE SOOOOOO DEAD WHEN I FIND YOU!

Windy-rose8: bye! See y'all next chapter! *turns off camera*

Misognome: *strangling Poison*

**Bonus! America had to wear the bear suit since he showed the most cowardice!**

**America: *in the bear suit* IS IT REALLY NECCESARY FOR YOU TO RECORD ME?**

**Misognome & Windy-rose8: YES! NOW DANCE FOR THIS LOVELY MAN STARING AT YOU OUT OF HIS WINDOW!**

**America: *starts doing the Macarena***

**Misognome & Windy-rose8: *laughing like crazy in the bushes, filming the whole thing on the "Blackmail" camera***

**Guy: da fucq?**

**So… yup… this is where my mind takes me when my boredom takes over (especially in October… that's when it's the scaryest). **

**BUT YOU DID READ RIGHT! I NEED HELP! AND I CAN BEILEVE IM DOING THIS BUT *puppy face* PWEASE GIVE ME DARES AND QUESTIONS!**

**And yes, I read Homestuck. I can hear people, shouting at their screens right now, "I HAVE FOUND MY PEOPLE!" **

**Adios my friends, I shall see you after I come back from my search for this thing called a "floor" in my room. I hope I come back alive… I don't want to get eaten by the dust bunnies…**


End file.
